Tuesday, 18 December 2012

Apocalypse How?

 You may have heard the rumour that it's the end of the world as we know it. Yes. That's right. The world is going to end on Friday. THIS FRIDAY!! December 21st, 2012!!

Some Mayan's may have predicted this thousands of years ago and sure the weather has been pretty strange lately...but does this all point to the destruction of the world? Well, not exactly, but if you pair that with the evidence laid out below we have some pretty convincing proof that humanity itself can not continue and so should probably just end.

Here are the top 10 REAL reasons the world is going to end:

10. Somebody named their newborn daughter...Hashtag. This kid needs the world to end before she gets to middle school. Thanks mom and dad. For her sake I hope they're right about Doomsday.

9. Somebody decided that Nikki Minaj should be on primetime family television. Really American Idol? Really? Just end it all now so I never have to be subjected to this insanity.

8. Nuff said. 


7. Most of the world has contracted a deadly and terrifying disease...Bieber Fever.

6. Grumpy cat wishes it. What grumpy cat wants. Grumpy cat gets. 

5. This guy says it will happen. He is clearly the leading expert and we should all take him very seriously.

4. Chris Hemsworth. Yes, he's to blame as well. You can't be THAT good looking without breaking some kind of natural order and throwing the whole world off balance. If you show up shirtless (or even with a shirt) to my home I may consider forgiving you, just get here before Friday.

Just let that soak in for a minute. Droooool.

3. They let Lindsay Lohan be in another movie. KA-BOOM!!

2. A Korean song that most  people don't understand is dominating the music scene. I think he may be singing about places to hide from the apocalypse. Too bad only people who speak Korean will know the secret.

Maybe hiding in an elevator will be the safest place. So many hidden meanings.

1. There will never be another Harry Potter book or movie. I wonder if J.K. Rowling knew that ending the series really meant ending THE WORLD?!?!?! 

So there you have it folks, the REAL reasons the world is going to end on Friday. It makes much more sense this way. Mayan calendar shmalendar. Of course there will be nay-sayers out there. I would probably fall into that category because to be honest...

(Kindly disregard in case of actual apocalypse)